"...the stars all aligned and thus a 'fitter' Leah was born"

It was going to happen sooner or later.

There was a time in my life when I was anti-diet. I was all for exercise; no problems with that. But tell me I am DENIED food and I will eat it right in front of you just to be defiant. What a miserable life it would be if I could not drink when I wanted, eat what I wanted, indulge how I wanted...I'm sure you catch my drift.

A few years back I got to know an uber sweet guy who turned out to be an Atkins-diet success story. He showed me a picture of him back in high school which was a great lot different to the guy who I met in person. I was incredibly impressed and admired his insane dedication, but there was no way you could ever get me to give up my carbs. NO. WAY.

Unfortunately, he has also become a cautionary tale of an example. I did not get to see him often but when I did he would be bigger than he was the time before. And the time before that. And the time before that. I have not seen him lately -- and I hope that he has not gone back to his old high school ways -- but I felt sad that he was slipping back into old routines. Not sure why I felt so bad...it wasn't MY body...but it sure was a shame to see all his hard work drift away.

As for me the workouts just were not getting me the results I was hoping for. I was feeling better, but the inches and pounds were not budging at all. It got to a point where I started making excuses not to go; after all, there was no real encouragement keeping me on track.

Then I started to slide down that same slope. I was not feeling all that great anymore...my self-image was unsatisfactory (and this was coming from a girl who usually LOVES herself to bits). I knew I should get back into the gym but the excuses kept on coming and I just did not feel like forcing myself into the gym.

Luckily, Weird Kid started going to a gym close to home so that got me into quasi-regular workouts with no excuse to skip out.

Later still, I switched offices and learned of how my manager used to be a lot heavier and how she went (and apparently succeeded) on the South Beach Diet. After hearing a bit about the basics of the diet I found myself actually contemplating a diet. No lie! A week later I was at my computer ordering the book online.

The more I read the book the more I convinced myself that this was a diet I could actually live with. Please don't misunderstand, I'm not trying to preach about the wonders of the South Beach Diet, it just became something that would work for me.

As added motivation I have caught a few episodes of the Biggest Loser: Couples. (Mom loves those reality shows!) I became emotionally bonded to one of the characters/contestants. She weighed the same as me at the beginning (edit: actually, after looking at the website she actually started out heavier than me -- but now she is lighter than me so that is still inspiring) and she has since lost so much. Whenever I catch the show I am impressed by her progress and motivated to keep on keeping on. Her arms are looking great! In my extreme vanity I consider myself just as pretty as her and I am convinced that I will only become prettier as the weight fades away...much like her.

On a side note: Mom was shocked when I admitted to how much I weigh. To my credit I do not think anyone could ever guess how much I weighed (a few friends whom I have worked out with in the past knew my real weight, but that's about it) and even when I first started tuning into Biggest Loser I could not believe the size of some of the contestants. They did not weigh much more than me but in my opinion they looked so much worse off. I seriously had to consider whether I had an over-inflated (no pun intended) opinion of how my own body actually looked. Were others seeing me as big as the women I was seeing on the show?

My mom and others have assured me that I have never looked like "them." Like I said, mom was amazed at how much I weighed. It still surprises me, however, how people who weigh the same can look so different from one another. When I would see diet commercials I felt they "padded" the numbers to make the actors and actresses seem a lot heavier than they actually were. After all, how would someone who is 120 pounds actually know what a 220 pound person is supposed to look like?

Back to what I was saying: Phase 1 (the first two, and strictest, weeks of the diet) were a bit hard. I'm not going to lie. I remember that first Friday trying to figure out something Daisy and I could do that would not ruin my diet or tempt me away from it. It seemed like there was NOTHING we could do! I felt so boring.

Moreover, I was not experiencing the speedy weight loss that the book's testimonials promoted. I was expecting that, though. There is always fine print. Just like those diet pills at Wal-Mart and what have you, if you look closely at the ads you will see the tiny writing at the bottom: "actual results may vary."

Those two weeks were only difficult on the weekends, the time I spent out and about with friends. Otherwise I really did not have a problem with the diet. Phase 2 started and the diet became even easier to live out. And even though I was not turbo-shedding the weight it was more than I could have ever hoped for compared to my old days at the gym.

It has been a month and a half and, I just have to share, I have lost 14 pounds so far! I love trying on new clothes and seeing how they flatter my body even better than in the past. My legs (my favorite part of me) have not been this firm since high school or even junior high. Same goes for my arms! I love going to the gym so I can push myself further and do my weigh-ins. It is truly exciting, and I do not feel like I have sacrificed much at all with regards to the foods I enjoy. I thought I would miss rice terribly. We are Asian, I used to have rice at least once a day. Eating with the family and watching them eat rice...I thought that would be extremely hard. But I find that I have not missed it much at all. With the little tweaks here and there that the diet has taught me I can easily swap out the cravings I used to have (I can recognize those cravings now) with a suitable just-as-tasty alternative.

Now I am looking at the target I set for myself and it does not feel like it's going to be a marathon effort to achieve my goal. If things remain steady there is no reason why I should not reach my goal by the summer. But what is to stop me there? I am not feeling restricted at all by my diet and my workouts have become a part of my weekly life rather than a chore. If I aim big and work hard I do not see anything stopping me from losing even more weight than I "signed up" for. It is an incredible rush.

It feels even better with all the encouragement I am receiving from my family and friends. Every compliment they pay me -- attention-whore that I am -- only pushes me that much harder. And if ever anyone told me they weren't seeing any results in me I think that would only drive me even more! (Not that anyone has told me that...yet.) I get giddy when my pants are practically falling off -- though I admit I do get sad when they are clothes that I loved -- and it is so fun trying on sizes that I have not bothered trying on in years...and then finding that they look great on me once again. Win-win-win for me!

Tokidoki by Simone Legno

Comments

Ang said…
Yay! Way to go, Leah!! It feels awesome, doesn't it, when you finally start seeing results?

I remember when I got awesome results from seeing a personal trainer before the wedding. I followed his diet advice (lots of meat/veggies, cutting out carbs as much as possible after lunch), was driven to work as hard as possible during our sessions, and was encouraged by the constant dwindling of the numbers on the scale from week to week.

I'm hoping to get the same (OK, in reality, I'll settle for similar, given the major THRASHING my body's gone through) results from another trainer as soon as my bonus arrives! =) I'm not liking this post-delivery body I've been left with . . .

Again, way to go!!
Leah said…
Thanks Ang. The encouragement means a lot! And I agree it's a big high seeing the work pay off. Plus, it's a different kind of weight. When I went through radiation I ended up losing 30 pounds. I have since gained all that back, of course, but the 15 I have lost this time around feels so much better. My body is tighter since I am toning...unlike when I was ailing and just losing the weight because my body had no other choice.

Aww, post-baby body came with its own reward. I wouldn't sweat it all that much. And after your body bounces back to what you like, I'm sure little Grace will have you running around making your workout even better! :)