*scrubbing fervently in the shower* Not. Clean. Enough!

My favorite quote ever from that short-lived animated series, The Critic.

Goodness, I need some therapy now. Hockey players are beyond dirty. And it's not the good kind of dirty, either. I'm scarred for life.

And of course, I would have to run into every single hockey-playing friend I have. Perfect timing, you guys, reappearing out of the woodwork after I've heard all about your filthy "team" activities.. Mental images of all the "games" you guys play. Oh my god, don't touch me.

Why, Iginla, why???