Bellini-induced Brain Freeze

My neck and shoulder have been so sore as of late; it's been driving me nuts. I blamed it on an uncomfortable sleep but it doesn't seem to be letting up very much. And then one night while I was trying to give myself a neck rub I noticed that some of the stiffness felt much too firm. It being on my right side, where all the cancer drama happened over 10 years ago, of course makes me feel a little nervous. One night Butch was trying to help work the knot out and he even admitted it felt like more than a knot. This meant a lot more to me since I didn't even tell him what I was already thinking about it all. Good thing my annual followup with Dr. H is coming up next month. I also have my annual physical scheduled with Dr. T a couple of weeks prior. Between the two of them I hope this thing comes out as just a big superknot. Or if it worked itself out before next month I'd probably feel a lot more comfortable, but to be on the safe side I'd rather they had the op...

So I dropped the ball again. So much has happened, and yet I never get around to writing. This is only, what, my 6th crane?! I have a looong way to go to 1000. Where did I leave off? Oh yeah, don't you worry your pretty little heads. I never went out with that guy (still don't have a moniker for him, not that it matters anymore) again. I told him I didn't want to waste his time or his money. That sounds kind of pimpish but what else would you call paying for someone else's video game play other than a waste of money? And I've turned another year older. Imagine my sadness when, as I was reading all my birthday greetings on a popular social media site I was also stumbling upon those same friends mourning an elementary school classmate on his social media page. Another numbing aspect: his birthday was only 3 days away from my own. His mom has always remembered me throughout the years so it was only right that I went to pay my condolences to her and the rest of his fa...

An update on my health: Yeah, I graduated from the Tom Baker Centre. They don't want to see me anymore. But I still check in with my ENT surgeon once a year to see how things are going. For the longest while, the worst byproduct of my radiation ordeal was my ear. It is so dry in there because it no longer produces its own oils so dirt and all sorts of nastiness just build up in there and my normal body functions do not kick into gear to clear it out like it should. So lo and behold, I had experienced my very first ear infection as a grown adult. Never had that problem as a kid, go figure. But other than the inconvenience of having to go every so often for him to clean it out (I don't dare take a Q-Tip to the area anymore) everything seemed alright. Until I guess one time he got it especially clean and noticed exposed bone in my ear. EXPOSED BONE! He figured the skin and tissues inside had sloughed off post-radiation and he referred me to a specialist to see what they ...

I read an article in today's newspaper and felt compelled to jump onto the soapbox that was once my blog. As many of you know, I'm not much of a follower in all things political/governmental so this will be more of an emotional response but I felt I had to say something. The article can be found here. but I have cut and paste the article at the bottom of this post in case this link ever disappears. A while ago I wrote about how I panicked when the Tom Baker Centre had decided that I had graduated out of my annual follow-up appointments. Reading today's article made me realize how very fortunate I had been - and for so long, too. I remember when I had my first appointment at the Tom Baker. Talk about a whirlwind. Following my parotidectomy they did a biopsy of my lump - standard procedure - and found it to be a bad guy. I don't think it was even a week after my surgeon told me the news and I was already walking into the Tom Baker with my parents to find out what wa...

Yesterday was my annual checkup at the Tom Baker cancer centre. It has now been almost seven years since I went through my radiation treatment. Nearly seven years since my parotidectomy and the crazy carnival ride that ensued. I haven't "achieved" the plans I laid out for myself as a little girl and I cannot figure out if this fact would upset me had I not had my cancer. Nothing seems to faze me now and I don't know if that's necessarily a good thing. I love my job when many others are looking for better paying jobs so they can have a better life. They wouldn't even consider my position if it were their only way of making ends meet...yet here I am content. I used to believe I would be married and have children by now but the more I get to experience life the more I am unwilling to start that chapter in my book. There is far too much I still wish to see, yearn to do, desire to try. Having kids with me or a significant other to factor into all my decisio...

Out of control Last week was my annual checkup at the Tom Baker Cancer Centre. Or rather, I guess I should specify that it was my fifth annual checkup. My five year anniversary, my supposed start date to buckle down, live my life, and move on as if I am just any other healthy girl on this planet. I didn't get to see my normal oncologist, which I thought was weird. Once a year and he can't even see me? Instead I got a guy in residence and the doctor he's been shadowing (is that right? I don't know how it really goes). I realize that every budding doctor has to start somewhere, but why with me? He doesn't know my history, other than what's written on my charts. Making the best of it he told me what my results were telling him, and I told him what had been bothering me as of late. Chest x-ray came out clear, MRI was a-ok. But THEN they decided to see me again next year. I don't know about them, but I thought this was my final checkup. After thinkin...