100 things about me that you probably will never need to know (or maybe you do)

If reading my bio from 3 or 4 years ago isn’t enough to drive you insane, here’s some up-to-date info. (Not that some of these have changed since then, I’m just clarifying points.)

1. My name’s pronounced lay-ah, like the princess. I’ll still answer to lee-ah, and I don’t make a big fuss about it.
   
2. I hate it when people ask me how to spell “lay-ah” and when I spell it out they go “Oh… LEE-ah.” This is NOT Hooked on Phonics and I know how to pronounce my own name, thanks!
   
3. It gets easier when you’re a good friend of mine. Everyone calls me Le. (“lay” – yes, I know.)
   
4. I eat around my sandwich/burger and work my way to the center.
   
5. If it’s a sub sandwich/hot dog I’ll bite from both ends, again working towards the middle. (You get the most of the best part in the middle.)
   
6. I’ll eat pizza either crust-first or crust-last depending on the make. Again, it’s all about saving the best for last.
   
7. When I pick up a newspaper/book/magazine at the store, I’ll take one from the middle so it’s in a more pristine condition.
   
8. I’ve thought about how nasty it would be of someone to lick the glue on the envelopes at the ATMs, let them dry, and then put them back inconspicuously….you know, just to be a jerk. (Anthrax?)
   
9. I’m all about bellinis and sangria.
   
10. Mojitos are excellent, too.
    
11. Sake at Sumo is very cost-efficient.
    
12. Malibu Slings are my beverage of choice at the clubs. (Thanks to my best friend.)
    
13. Nobody can hear me in a club and so I’ve ended up with the craziest drinks at times.
    
14. Warning: Being of the male gender and wearing D & G by Dolce & Gabbana will most likely result in me pouncing on you.
    
15. Early tests point to Paradise by Alfred Sung producing the same effect.
    
16. If you are a male Nu Yorican Marine you are soooooo mine.
    
17. If you are Jarome Iginla you are totally mine.
    
18. Vin Diesel = mine
    
19. It’s fun being a bit of a redhead.
    
20. I still possess all my New Kids on the Block tapes, CDs, dolls, concert videos, books, bedsheets…my NKOTB mini-duffle has become my swim bag.
    
21. I never turned in my Milli Vanilli CD for reimbursement after they were exposed as frauds. I have never regretted that decision.
    
22. I am queen of the Whack-A-Mole. Go ahead, challenge me.
    
23. My parents, despite not wanting to know my gender prior to birth, assumed I would be a boy.
    
24. If I had been born a boy, I would be Gary Edmond…named after the two cities they lived in respectively before they met (Calgary and Edmonton.)
    
25. As a little girl I always dreamed I would live somewhere bigger and more exciting when I was older. However, the more I see of the world the more I know I could never leave Calgary. Life is peaceful and much too good here.
    
26. Despite the tropical nature of my cultural background, I quite enjoy the cold. And I whine when it gets too hot.
    
27. I had a dog when I was really young and I named her Smurfette ‘cuz she was so tiny. She grew quickly to be a HUGE puppy. My parents gave her away to our neighbors ‘cuz they were afraid she would knock me over too much.
    
28. At one point we had 3 pet turtles: Peekaboo (mine), Migotch (brother’s) and Spike (sister’s). They were adorable but unfortunately, the smelliest pets we’d ever had. We ended up giving them to a local restaurant for them to add to their pond. We visit them from time to time.
    
29. I watch Saturday Night Fever several times a year. I think this one was obvious.
    
30. I will marry the man who knows how to make a kickass tiramisu.
    
31. Bonus points if he makes excellent Eggs Benedict.
    
32. I have an extreme fear of snakes. I will not even touch a snakeskin purse. (Mom used to have one.)
    
33. I am afraid of heights when I am standing. Walking on overpasses make my knees go weak. Apparently fear is a factor for me.
    
34. I don’t like bugs. Incidentally, my grandma used to get me to behave by holding dragonflies in her hand, telling me they were her friends, and threatening to unleash them on me if I wasn’t good. To this day I still don’t know if dragonflies bite, but they ARE pretty, I’ll admit.
    
35. Contemplating boob reduction surgery is an annual occurrence at the very least.
    
36. One day I mentioned that if I were to get a tattoo, I would get an orchid on my inner thigh. A friend then informed me that, apparently, orchid means “testicle” in Greek or something like that. Now ain’t that a hoot?
    
37. I enjoy tofu dessert with maple syrup on top.
    
38. Fudgsicles are my weakness.
    
39. Never mind that. Most ice creams are my weakness. But I DO have a softspot for Fudgsicles.
    
40. Although I don’t drive, I adore Volkswagens. New Beetle, Beetle, Golf, Jetta, Thing, they’re all fantastic.
    
41. My favorite characters on Fraggle Rock were the Doozers. My heart went out to them since the Fraggles kept eating their projects.
    
42. My first relationship may have been abusive. :) By default, my boyfriend in 1st grade was the best friend of my best school friend’s boyfriend (you follow?). Our idea of a good time during recess was him lightly pushing me against the chainlink fence where I would bounce back giggling.
    
43. I can’t stand cilantro.
    
44. Pickles and celery are not my favorites, but I won’t go out of my way to pick them out of my food if they are already there.
    
45. I possess the peculiar talent of knowing an abundance of party line dances. Macarena? Electric Slide? Slapping Leather? I’ll show you how it’s done. And yes, for some reason I know the Ketchup Dance.
    
46. I don't like male hairiness and big Adam's apples.
    
47. As a little girl, I thought I was destined to be a flight attendant. I had their routine memorized by the time I was in 2nd grade.
    
48. In twelfth grade my friends and I prepared a song and dance routine for the school karaoke contest. They sang the group parts but choked during their solos (after I had nervously squeaked out my solo first) and completely neglected our choreography. Rather than bring more attention to my dancing by stopping abruptly I just carried on for the whole song.
    
49. Cookies are love. And if you were a friend of mine in high school you could bet on a homemade bag of cookies and a Christmas card every year. Friends will testify for my peanut butter cookies and such.
    
50. Sadly, that tradition died once university started. Too bad I hadn't started the tradition earlier, like in junior high.
    
51. I had never tried smoking up until early this year. I can now say with certainty that I can definitely live without it.
    
52. My lack of smoking finesse was no more apparent than during my Physics final in twelfth grade. Part of my final exam was conducting an experiment using light and lenses...except instead of flashlights they gave us candles as our light source. I had to raise my hand to get my teacher to light my candle because I could not get the lighter to work for the life of me.
    
53. I light candles all the time now. Lighters are fun.
    
54. Matches still terrify me.
    
55. I have a penchant for lighting available paraphernalia while sitting in the booths at the clubs...unused straws, flyers left at the table, paper napkins...
    
56. Despite what you think, I'm not a pyro.
    
57. "Icky old men" are my curse, and I cannot seem to grow out of the phenomenon.
    
58. Noone has succeeded in witnessing me "completely wasted"
    
59. There are 2 guesses as to how I would behave when wasted. 1) I would be extremely chatty. Night of my debut, after my first time ever at the clubs, we were hanging out at my hotel room winding down the night. We were, and I remember this vividly, watching A Current Affair and they were doing a piece on JonBenet Ramsay. I became absolutely passionate about the issue and voiced my feelings on "the tragedy" and "the shame."
    
60. Guess no. 2) I would be absolutely boring. My head feels absolutely disconnected and/or heavy after drinking bottles of Tabu/Smirnoff Ice/Mike's Hard/Rev way too quickly. During times like those, nothing is more inviting than laying across the booth benches at the clubs...much to my friends' dismay and fear that we will get kicked out. And if you are thinking I drink a lot of bottles for this to happen, these days it only take maybe one and a half within a half-hour to have that effect on me.
    
61. At least I don't turn red like most Asians when I've consumed alcohol.
    
62. People cannot identify my nationality readily. I've been considered Chinese, Mexican, Native American (someone asked what tribe I was from), among others. My dad played with some tourists during a roadtrip we took to Vancouver. He told them we were Hawaiian and they believed him. Never mind that we had Alberta license plates and how could we have possibly driven to the mainland?
    
63. My looks undoubtedly take after my dad. There have been a few pictures in the past where I bear a striking resemblance to my mother. When this happens my mom and I are usually dumbfounded.
    
64. I have a thing for Japanese paper lanterns.
    
65. For the majority of junior high I was a wallflower. My lame excuse was that guys were supposed to ask me to dance, not the other way around, and guys that did ask me to dance...well, I wasn't interested. (Goodness, I was dumb, it was just a dance!) In high school, my school didn't want trouble so we had NO high school dances other than our graduation banquet. I was unleashed that night...and I had no problems with asking my guy friends to dance.
    
66. On a related note, when my junior high friends first saw me perform with the show choir in high school (I got a spot on the floor rather than the risers, I felt like a star!) they were amazed that this once-shy, quiet girl had somehow turned into a dancing maniac.
    
67. I did not become shy until I switched schools halfway through elementary. It amazed me that not everyone wanted to be my friend and I would actually have to work at making friends rather than them approaching me magnetically.
    
68. Those first four years of elementary were the best; nothing beats having the whole class as your friend. Mom couldn't handle it, though. I had one big birthday party in 2nd grade and after that she told me I had to trim my guest list substantially.
    
69. My friends will tell you, though I do not recall this at all, that my teachers back then would constantly remind my friends to tell me to stop talking in class.
    
70. Now people complain that I don't talk enough.
    
71. I'm getting better though...getting back to my original self. Too bad it has taken more than a decade so far.
    
72. Yes, I have a thing for Spanish stuff.
    
73. The Child's Play films may be really stupid, but I can never get to sleep after watching them.
    
74. I first saw The Exorcist one late night when I was about 10 years old. I laughed it off 'cuz it was "soooooo fake."
    
75. I'm too afraid to watch it a second time, in case this time I actually do find it scary.
    
76. Male strippers are something I truly cannot understand. They seem dumb and don't do anything for me. Guys are lucky in that female strippers actually know how to do a good job. Hence, they have nothing to complain about.
    
77. As a little girl, me, my best friend, and another friend would make up choreography to our favorite Mini-Pops tunes and perform them for our parents.
    
78. These same three families usually went on fishing daytrips to Little Bow Park together. I was constantly the mini-damsel in distress.
    
79. I've never caught a fish.
    
80. One time, I found myself thigh deep in a mud pit. I was so stuck I couldn't move. Thinking it was quicksand somehow, I started freaking out as the rest of my friends tried to pull me out and save me. I'm still here today. :)
    
81. Another time, us kids went swimming in the swimming part of the park. Inexplicably I lost my footing and started flailing around. I just couldn't get myself back upright. I ended up crying on the beach lamenting how I "almost drowned." I'm still here today. :)
    
82. It would appear that I have a strong attraction to water. I can be wading ankle-deep in a lake and somehow find myself fully submerged a minute later.
    
83. During a birthday party in 2nd grade I somehow got my leg jammed between the ladder and the slide platform at the Calgary Zoo. Everybody tried to help me get it out, to no avail. Once the zoo guy left us to go get tools to dismantle the ladder my leg miraculously popped free and we walked away.
    
84. I love Nine Inch Nails' "Closer," but the rest of the CD freaks me out.
    
85. I want some clothing bearing an "L." Just like Laverne from Laverne and Shirley.
    
86. Laverne and Shirley still crack me up.
    
87. As a little girl my mom and I would stay up watching the Benny Hill Show late at night while waiting for my dad to come home from work. None of us saw anything wrong with a toddler/kindergarten girl watching Benny Hill.
    
88. I still remember one particular episode when Benny was playing a mischievous school boy with a slingshot. He went to an "exotic" show where a lady entertainer was dancing naked while holding a big ball to "cover her bits." Thinking it would be amusing he aimed his slingshot at the ball and, instead of the ball, the lady deflated. I don't think experiences like these corrupted my childhood. (You cannot blame everything on music and television.)
    
89. There is a raised scar on the bottom of my right foot. This was a result of me trying to climb my closet to get to the toys higher up and falling down, ending up with my foot gouged on the metal hookie-thingies that keep the closet doors flush when closed.
    
90. There is a light scar on my left wrist where, when I was a little girl, my friend and I were playing with my broken screen door thrusting our hands out at each other from opposite ends of the door. During one of my turns, the upper glass panel decided to try and guillotine my hand off. Perhaps I'm over-exaggerating, but regardless there is still a scar there.
    
91. I have never broken any bones, but both my ankles have been twisted more than Chubby Checker. It was a common occurrence for me during my elementary school days.
    
92. One of my favorite elementary school memories was playing dodgeball circle-style in PE class. Seeing as everyone wanted to preserve me they all aimed at the other guy left in the ring with me. After I had "won" they hoisted me on their shoulders and we all did a victory lap around the gym. Again, I was a star!
    
93. In kindergarten, I loved being picked as the cheese during Farmer In The Dell. "The cheese stands alone, the cheese stands alone. Hi-ho-the-derry-oh the cheese stands alone." I can't explain it.
    
94. I own 5 watches and still cannot manage to be on time for most occasions.
    
95. When I was a baby I loved sleeping on my daddy's belly.
    
96. Chances are, when dining at a non-culturally thematic restaurant, I will order a quesadilla of some kind or a Philly cheesesteak.
    
97. My idea of Mr. Perfect is a man who will only eat the cream part of an Oreo and then give me the cookies. That way we don't waste any of it.
    
98. I've got quite a bit of makeup considering I barely ever wear it.
    
99. I cried during Free Willy when the boy sets the whale free. I also cried in Aladdin when Aladdin sets the genie free. I laughed during Titanic when Rose let Jack sink to the bottom of the ocean.
    
100. I vaccuum like a fiend when I'm pissed off.