"Brown girl in the ring, traalalalala. There's a brown girl in the ring, traaalalalalala."

Who in the world came up with that song? Never mind, just found out it's Boney M. Go figure.

"She looks like a sugar in a plum, plum plum."

Oi, anyway. Cell phone, contract's been two years now. You know what that means, boys and girls? Hardware upgrade!

I was shocked, nay, baffled, when I tried to get some guys' opinions on phones. Guys are gadgety, correct? They know what's good and what's not-so-good....ask them! Turns out, no, a phone is a phone is a phone. Whoa, could've fooled me.

Alright, so in the past I've had that big honking Motorola MicroTAC (Micro, hah!) which turned into the Ericsson T18d. I adored that Ericsson. Then it broke, and it was past warranty...and it was more cost-effective to just get a new phone (hardware upgrade yet again). So, being a moron, I got the Nokia 3360. And I KNEW I shouldn't have got it. You see, when they were busy looking at my Ericsson to give me a repair quote they gave me a Nokia 3310 (and I'm sure these numbers mean nothing to you, I've just realized....you all seem to memorize the letters and numbers that go with cars but with phones??? Whatever.) and I despised it. So WHAT if I could get downloadable ringtones. So WHAT if it had games?

The past two years I've realized that I really don't like Nokias. They are nothing but flashy toys. Ooh, get a flashing battery! (I admit, I have that.) Get a new faceplate! (I admit, I have that, too. I think I was trying to make my phone more likeable) I really don't need a phone that has an FM radio and MP3 player. What is that all about? No more Nokia for me, thanks.

My massive Motorola, or as my friends called it at the time, "Desert Storm" (Think, Clooney and Wahlberg in Three Kings.) was very reliable, and thank goodness they don't make them that size anymore. So Motorola's a possibility. However, Daisy and Bizkette both own the C333...and I'm ashamed to admit I failed them in getting a highly practical, yet snazzy, phone. It isn't very loud when you talk/listen. Polyphonic ringtones are another one of those "ooh pretty but absolutely worthless" features. You can't hear the phone ringing in your purse, definitely not in a bar, or even just walking down a busy street.

I guess polyphonic ringtones are the latest rage/plague. I don't think I'll get away with a phone that isn't polyphonic unless I go for an older, practically obsolete model.

Which brings me back to Ericsson. My T18d was insanely loud, but it wasn't polyphonic so that was good. However, even if I somehow didn't hear it ring, the vibratealert was so manic that there was no way I would miss it ringing in my purse. Hopefully their latest, although they have paired up with Sony, would have that kind of fierce vibratealert.

So out of these my heart is setting itself on one of these.

Unless someone can tell me the merits of considering this.

Does anybody have any opinions at all?