Hello caller, you're on the air (or something to that effect)

Reynold comments on my previous post:

"You have evaded the Bigger Picture however, are you concern about your present situation, do you see yourself married, explore the inner you and then speak to us."

So let's explore this.

When I was a little girl I always knew I'd get married and have kids. The "plan" was to get married out of university and kids promptly thereafter. Well...my university graduation came and went and there wasn't anyone in the picture so that "plan" kind of died.

And now we're going on 5 years since graduation. Does it concern me? Not really. As I've said before, I'm not going to actively go on the hunt because I think that is forced/unnatural. It's just not my time yet, that's all. But make no mistake, I DO see myself getting married. Or at the very least I do see myself with kids. Is that wrong? I'm sure there will be words within the family circle if that were ever to happen.

But on the flipside, though I see myself being a Mrs somewhere down the line, I'm not ready for it yet. (Did you ever think you would hear me say that???) And I'll tell you why: social regression.

That probably makes no sense to you right now.

I'm not dogging on couples. No no no. I just can't see one guy being my entire world right now. It's not that I want to date multiple guys...I want to be able to enjoy my friends and family in addition to a boyfriend. But unfortunately I don't see it happening much.

Elaborate? Well, you know that episode of Sex and the City where the girls talk about how the couples see singles as "the enemy?" It's not that I feel threatened by others for being single, but it's true that we just don't mesh with couples. Not in a malicious way, but really. All my married/deeply committed friends...don't spend much time with them anymore. With the exception of Latina and her new husband...but will that change once they find married/coupled friends of their own?

My dance class is another example. It is practically junior high in the way people behave. If they came as a couple they refuse to split and practice with new dance partners (although our instructor does his best to encourage everybody learning other people's styles). I mean, come on! I did not join this class so I could steal your husband/boyfriend/whatever! Do I look like Angelina Jolie?!

Even when their significant other isn't in the room, they cling to the notion of their beloved. Latina and I were standing there at my first class when a gentleman approached us for a dance. Latina, in what I interpreted as a panic, blurted out "we're dancing together!" indicating her and I. Well didn't we look mean, in addition to foolish, when the guy left and avoided us the whole night by going to the other side of the room...and we still had to rotate partners. (But I didn't want to learn the guy's part anyway...that's not what I was paying for.) I think Latina's a doll, but was it so wrong if she danced with the guy? And what about me? I was completely free to dance with him (it's not like he was proposing marriage) but instead she spoke for both of us.

Apparently I'm in the minority with this thinking. I've discussed this with my coworkers and other married friends and they've all told me the same thing. If they came with their significant others they wouldn't really want to dance with anyone else. It's a comfort thing, I've been told. Nevermind that you're not really getting the most out of the lesson 'cuz you're only getting used to one partner's style...but are you really going to dance with many other partners in your life once you're married?

But what is up with that? What is it about being in a couple that makes you unable to socially interact with new people (generally of the opposite sex...but some just can't interact with ANYONE else, period)?

I should stop before Daisy tells me I'm channeling "Carrie Bradshaw" again. :)

So in summary, to respond to Reynold's comment, I will get married someday. Just you watch. I'm just not going to "go there" just yet.