All Good Boys Deserve Fudge. Good Boys Deserve Fudge Always

One thing definitely hasn't changed in my blogging style: I always want to start my posts with some kind of musical reference.

Another social network has basically taken over my life on the internet. I'm sure there are quite a few of you out there who can easily guess what I am talking about. It is just too convenient for a little snoopy voyeur like myself. It is like the Cliff's Notes of someone's life rather than having to click and read every single blog post. In a minute you can find out where your old high school friend is working now, what their academic achievements have been, whether or not they are seeing someone at the moment or if they have gone in a domestic way and did the whole married-with-2.5-kids thing. They are not kidding when they say this network is like an addiction. I find myself looking up people from my past, people who I don't really care much about, just to see who's doing what and how. We have all become subjects of our own personal gossip rag.

One friend recently "added" a girl we used to hang out with in high school. Naturally, I pounced on the chance to see what she has been up to (but heaven forbid I "add" this girl myself!) In seconds I can see that she has not changed much at all and in fact she is engaged. I'm not surprised; she was the type who was bent on finding that "right guy;" much like one would work on their career ambitions.

Note: dating compared to a job hunt/career search is a topic that has come up lately. More on that another time.

Finding out more about this girl and how much (little) has changed also made me realize how little I have changed in all these years.

My reaction to the pictures of her fiance? "She's getting what she deserves."

That's not me being impressed or proud of this girl, folks. That's me being all catty...claws out...rawr.

I know...I know...I know that there is some unspoken rule about couples in general and how they are usually par with one another in appearance. You are not going to find Jennifer Aniston with Carrot Top, for instance. But there are always the exceptions. Those which one friend used to explain as guys/girls who shoot for the moon because they do not have anything to lose...and that is when you see Angelina Jolie types strolling and canoodling with Gilbert Gottfried types.

I am not saying that the Gilbert Gottfrieds of the world do not deserve Angelina Jolies. But somewhere in there, I swear...I swear to you there must be at least a small element of self-esteem issues in the mix.

Another friend of mine has been seeing a Gilbert Gottfried (I'm going to shorten this up to GGs from now). She has been seeing GG for a loooong time. I can't wrap my head around it. Everything about this guy irritates me from the moment he opens his mouth and I have to listen to his annoying voice. Her current credo: "nice stands for something."

My response to that? NICE IS THE MINIMUM! Of course a significant other would have to be "nice." Why would one date a jerk? Even if he or she is hot, noone puts up with them if they are a jerk. At least they shouldn't.

By the way, though this should be inherent knowledge, when trying to set up friends on a blind date -- or maybe you yourself are putting together a (eek) personal ad -- NEVER use the word "nice" to describe them/yourself. As I've said, "nice" is the minimum. If you ask me, "nice" always comes with a "but." A read-between-the-lines "but." ("You'll love him! He is such a nice guy!" Translation: Have some compassion and give this runt of the litter a chance! So what if he is cross-eyed.) Nice is such a generic word. A spring day is nice, getting a little extra whip cream on your coffee is nice. If you want to "sell" someone on a potential love interest tell them he or she is sweet, thoughtful, considerate... There are so many words out there that are leagues better than nice.

Ok, as I was saying, nice is the minimum. If you ask her what else she likes about this guy she ends up stumped for a response. I am concerned she has settled (oh dread!) for the minimum.

And this, my friends, is where my whole title about deserving things comes into play.

Of course GG could not be happier. He won! He gets my friend. She's great, stylish, savvy, all the things that he isn't. He scored big. You can't convince me, could never convince me, that he deserves a girl as wonderful as my pal.

But what saddens me is her side of the story. Is this all she thinks she is worth? Don't get me wrong; I don't want her to end up with some good-looking guy who likes to throw her around a la Ike Turner. Couldn't she have more patience and wait for a wonderful guy? One whom she cannot stop raving about because she actually KNOWS what she likes and loves about him? I tell you, this future guy will be more than "nice" in her description.

Please don't misunderstand me, I do not want you to think that this is some shallow rant all about appearances. This is just the best way I can explain things at the moment.

Those who know the type of guy I like physically would have been surprised by the guy I chose, or would have chosen. Sadly, he did not choose me. Truth be told for once (or one of the few times I guess I should say) I have been hurt by a guy whom I suppose decided he deserved someone better than me. I'm not dogging myself. Perhaps I should have worded that last sentence as "better for him."

But if anyone asked me what I saw in him I would have loads to say. Loads! He was uber bright, well-read, incredibly worldly when it came to everything around him, adorably thoughtful... god, I could go on but it would just make me feel even more sad thinking about it all again.

Even with the way he looks now, which was not the way he looked when I first met him, I would still think he is "totally boss." :P I'm a little sad that all his hard work has fallen by the wayside but if he is happy in his state then that's all one could ask for. Heaven knows he had more discipline than me in that respect and I'VE always been happy with my state of appearance. Besides, I can't express my concern for his health at this point...there is that fear that he would misinterpret my comments as a catty way of trying to hurt him for leaving me behind.

In the end, though, I'm certain I will get what I deserve. And he will be fantastically more than nice.