Bellini-induced Brain Freeze

Ladies and gentlemen, Leah has botched it up yet again. Oh, and I apologize for the long hiatus. Does anyone still read this out there?! A little more than a month ago, a newly divorced (and gorgeously single) friend of mine decided to join an online dating site. (Shhhh!) She asked me to join along. Partially curious, I dove into the online dating scene. I've met guys from the internet before. How different could this be, right? I've never liked the concept of speed dating, but geez this is perhaps sprint-dating. Granted, I had been experiencing a drought regarding male attention (ever since I lost all the weight! It baffles my mind. Am I too cocky now? Nah, that can't be it. :P ) but this was like a dam breaking! Before I let all the attention get to my head I found a handful whom I thought I may have a possible "connection" with and ran with that. For the most part, all the guys have been great. I haven't met any creepy guys (at least not in perso...

I just read over all my good news from the posts previous. What a downer this one will be. :( This has been building up for at least a few months now. I wonder if we can be so happy in other aspects of our life that it outweighs the grief and frustration in another part of it? If so, then it looks like my abundance of joy everywhere else is stretching thin now. It can only bolster me for so much longer. Ever since our latest restructuring in my department I have become more and more dissatisfied with my work. The profession which I used to love so much has now become a job that makes me miserable. I can even feel it in my body; after 3 or so days of being out of the office I start to feel physically ill as I prepare to return. I do not think I am one for such melodramatics so surely this must mean something severe. Surely everyone else around me has noticed this? I have gone from the top of my game to rarely/barely achieving the minimum. And I know what it is: the office they h...

Yesterday was my annual checkup at the Tom Baker cancer centre. It has now been almost seven years since I went through my radiation treatment. Nearly seven years since my parotidectomy and the crazy carnival ride that ensued. I haven't "achieved" the plans I laid out for myself as a little girl and I cannot figure out if this fact would upset me had I not had my cancer. Nothing seems to faze me now and I don't know if that's necessarily a good thing. I love my job when many others are looking for better paying jobs so they can have a better life. They wouldn't even consider my position if it were their only way of making ends meet...yet here I am content. I used to believe I would be married and have children by now but the more I get to experience life the more I am unwilling to start that chapter in my book. There is far too much I still wish to see, yearn to do, desire to try. Having kids with me or a significant other to factor into all my decisio...