Lonely Times

Self-isolation is becoming more of a serious thing at an UBER rapid pace. This morning I went to drive mom and baby sis to church but I was running late so as a fix we watched mass online. Little did we know that by the end of the day the province would be including religious gatherings as part of the public events that would be shut down. While we were at the house we discussed Tuesday's plans and mom admitted she would be more comfortable if we hosted the dinner at home rather than at the brewery. So I called and asked to order food for take out and cancel our reservation. I also reached out to the rest of the family and luckily everyone is still available to attend and meeting at the house is perfectly fine with them all. The hostess on the phone made a it very clear that they thanked us for supporting their business at this time. I'm sure they are not having it very easy right now. After that we went to the nursing home to spend some time with Grandma. I figured it's only a matter of time before they isolate her and the rest of the residents to protect them from the virus. Turns out we were too late. Visitations are not allowed until further notice. I couldn't even stop into her room to say hello and explain how the next little while is going to be (if she can even retain that info). One of my biggest concerns since dad "stopped visiting" grandma is that she will feel abandoned by the family. Up until now we have all done a great job making sure she gets to see at least one of us each day. Now it looks like we've just jumped up and disappeared without letting her know where we've gone. I'm going to try and call her early this week to try and explain why we're not visiting and hopefully we'll see her again soon. I know her sense of time is a bit lost but I do not want to risk her recalling that we have disappeared without explanation as one of her lucid thoughts that pepper her day. It also makes me sad thinking of her just sitting around without a peep from any of us or seeing us for a long(? hopefully not) while. How long before she starts to forget us? Will she stress and will it affect her health? Will she be sad and will THAT affect her health? It's so hard to think of. Since the visit with grandma was a bust we decided to grab some lunch before deciding what to do next. I had already had it set in my mind that visiting dad was going to be part of today's plans...even though I intend to stop by again on his birthday this Tuesday after work. We also stopped by the cemetery office to order a wreath that they can hopefully place by dad by his birthday -- they said they would do their best to get it done tomorrow. Luckily we are free to visit dad without any risk of them closing it off due to the pandemic. And of course, just before we met up back at the house for dinner tonight the province and the city both held press releases. We are now in a state of emergency, schools are now closed -- I cannot help but think of my goddaughter as she finishes her last few months of high school. I wonder what the government is going to do about the provincial final exams? And surely the graduation ceremony and celebration are considered large public gatherings...I cannot help but sense her disappointment without even asking her how she feels at the moment. She has had her graduation dress all picked out since before Christmas! I'm sure the province/country/world is going to go through further lockdown. The Philippine president has effectively halted all travel until at least April 14...we have family there on vacation, who knows with everything happening right now when and how they are going to get back to Canada. Will any Canadian airports close down as well? I've said to others that I really believe self-isolation is the best way for us to try and control and beat this thing...but I guess I thought I would have more time to prepare (and get to see grandma) before we were truly shut off and left on our own to keep calm and healthy. As we discussed at dinner I'm glad dad didn't pass away at this crazy time...not being able to grieve fully with all our family and friends would have been so much harder. Not that there is ever a good time to depart from your loved ones but it's like he knew hot to time it properly. I wonder what he thinks of all this madness going on now.