"Just like me, they long to be close to you." So last Friday the Usual Suspects and I had our "routine" unwind at Caffe Beano. "Routine" is in quotations for a reason I shall discuss later. As per usual, we closed the place down, but that's not very hard to do when it's Friday night and only midnight. When we stepped outside there was a scooter at the door and this got everyone talking about everything from fuel efficiency to how it looked kind of mucky (my contribution, what can I say? Scooters should look impeccable and stylish, not mucky...though Daisy said later about Civic saying something about how this vehicle wasn't technically a scooter or something. Whatever, it's cute and small and can take me around town.) Naturally, right before I'm about to say something about how it looks junked the owner steps out and sits on the bench behind us. So now the boys are all talking to him about fuel efficiency and blah di blah. Us ...
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Moving on up Weird Kid, darling brother that he is, convocated last Tuesday. Obviously we're super proud of him. The stats make my family look good, not that that is what it's all about, but still. My parents produced two university graduates! I didn't really think much about it until my mom broke it down, seems like we're the only ones in the family circle (blood-wise) thus far. And with that my brother treated himself to a new car as his reward. Not brand new, but it's still pretty snazzycakes. Not to mention it's his first stick-shift. Much better than I, that's for sure. It's fun riding around in his Infiniti, though. All I've got to show for the past week is my new entertainment console. I'm building it all by myself, I might add. (Hopefully it can hold up my TV, haha.) Plus I got a bit of a raise so yay for me! It's not much compared to my brother Mr. Geophysicist :) but it was still cause for a smile. As fate would have it I...
Deal or no deal A really steadfast dealbreaker for me at my age are guys who are divorced already I’m sure my opinion will change as I get older, but for a guy to have married and divorced before even hitting 30 cries out “foul” in my mind. And of course you never get the whole story, usually it’s only his side. But somehow at some point they fell apart. Maybe they were reckless and got married too soon or maybe they just grew apart from one another. In any case it doesn’t give me a very wise and mature impression of the guy. Why am I telling you this? Remember that one hot TA in my salsa class? My crush on him grows bigger by the week. I must have a giddy look on my face whenever I get to practice with him. What can I say? It feels so good to be dancing in the arms of someone who knows what he’s doing and is damn good at it. I peg him at early 30s, tops. Smart dresser, smells nice, confident dancer. Although it’s poor dance form I notice I move my body closer and closer...
Friday, I'm in Love Well, not really, but Tubby Dog's special this month - the Aunt May - is the best hot dog they've come up with thus far I'd have to say. Let's see, there was potato salad, mustard, scallions, and lots and lots of grated cheese. So. Good. I update Weird Kid on the Tubby Dog specials so often I swear he thinks I eat there on a regular basis. Contrary to popular belief this was only my 3rd Tubby Dog since they opened last year(?). I've had the A-Bomb (space cheese, bacon bits, potato chips) and the Slaw Dog (cole slaw, chili, I can't remember what else) but Aunt May has been the best by far. Too bad it's only here for a short while. Yeah, Friday was our typical jaunt around 17th. We started with some tea at Steeps (no Caffe Beano this time!), always good. had Tubby Dog, then we ended up at Tim Hortons where we helped Daisy out with her school marking. It had been so long since I've helped her mark her students' homework...
Would you like to buy a vowel? Skrong Pronunciation: 'skro[ng] Function: noun : the effect on fuller-figured women wearing peasant skirts which causes the fabric to gather in between the legs while walking (don't laugh, I've seen way too many of these lately) The look that is inevitably created is that of a "so-wrong-sarong-for-each-leg AKA flowy long skort." Illustrations graciously omitted to preserve the reader's eyesight. See, there are other reasons why I would never wear a peasant skirt other than the fact that they are laaaaaame. Not even just lame, they are brokeback like baby massages. (inside joke.) Smort Pronunciation: 'smort Function: noun : knee-length or less than knee-length trousers, more typically landing mid-thigh, with a prominently high slit on each side. The look that is inevitably created is that of a high-slitted skort for men (minus the front panel). See also: the 1970s, American Apparel, pansies. Cremony Pronunciation: ...
Long weekend = short work week Good stuff. We didn't go away for the long weekend, but we still managed to get together and do a lot. Lots of togetherness. Lots of good times. Friday, Weird Kid and I caught an early show of The DaVinci Code. I am quite impressed that they stayed pretty true to the novel, although Weird Kid pointed out that those who haven't read the book might find it a bit confusing. Still, it was fantastic but I still don't see Tom Hanks when I envision Robert Langdon. Oh well. Then, we had sushi at Tokyo Garden. Yummm. A friend of Spidermonkey's takes his whole wad of wasabi and mixes it with his soy sauce. It's incredible. I am the type of person who can't even handle a dot of wasabi. Saturday, us siblings and our friends went to watch Over The Hedge (the fact that these two movies opened on the same weekend caused quite a dilemma for us). That movie was adorable! Steve Carell as Hammy was fantastic! Then, we had cheesecake at th...
The end of the world Well, let’s hope that isn’t the case but it seemed like Thursday was a major campaigning day of the religious sort. On my commute to work this aggressive, evangelist-style lady (and a Filipina, to boot) started some sort of sermon with the young couple across the aisle from her. The young lady in the couple looked bored, fussing with her nails, but the young guy looked amused. I couldn’t quite hear what he was saying to the Jimmy Stewart lady but you could definitely hear her side of the conversation. The whole train car could hear her. Out of curiosity I turned down my iPod so I could hear her better. According to her, an angel communicated with her by directing her to specific passages in the Bible and revealed to her the “plan of God” which apparently included “burying the Earth.” Apparently her edition of the Bible was the best you could get and all others pale in comparison. She also said that she “hate(d) to tell (us) this but Mormons and Jehovah’s Witn...
Heat wave Wow, it's May and already it's way too hot out there. I foresee a very whiny Leah this season. So much for the tropical blood of my forefathers, huh? My word of the moment has been "pansy." Have you seen Madagascar? Sascha Baron Cohen as the Lemur King? Remember how he says "pansy?" Yeah, say it like that. Fun, no? Civic and I were discussing the other day how a dear friend of ours is generally attracted to scrawny, androgynous-type guys (pansies) whereas I would most likely be keen on guys who could break these pansies in half. Pansy-wompers. Big muscles, big voices, NO long hair or anything girl-like whatsoever. Boxing trumps yoga. Wear pink and you're out, I don't care if it's en vogue right now. The gospel according to Leah. You may be a pansy if: You have no mind of your own. You can't even share an opinion with me. Worse still, you have to ASK me what my opinion is so that you can have an opinion. I am practical...
Not a puppet, but still a clown Saturday night. Flag girl, Daisy, and I decided to go out dancing. It had been ages since I had gone out dancing wholeheartedly. On my birthday I was exhausted. On Posie's birthday I was under the weather. Finally! A night to just go out and groove with the best of them. And with that evening comes a new bonehead boy story. Again, it's been ages since I've had a new bonehead boy story to share with all of you! As always, my story begins out on the dance floor. I'm dancing, doing my thing, yadda yadda. Guy starts making his way over, trying not to be obvious, yadda yadda. Next thing I know, his hands are on my hips and he's grinding with me from behind. Typical. Now, if you're thinking "uh oh, this is one of those stories where Leah doesn't set the boundaries again " you'd be partially correct. True, I had seen him coming up. I could have dismissed him right from the start. But, excuse me for repeating myself...
Not your typical Muppet Puppetry of the Penis Yes, I paid good money to see two grown men demonstrate the fine "art of genital origami." Or, more to the point, I spent hard-earned dollars to witness two guys spend an hour with themselves showing tricks they learned in the bathroom when they were bored/performed for their friends while they were drunk at a pub. I thought it was great fun, but the price of the ticket was kind of steep for what it was. One thing's for sure: I learned how elastic the male member was. Little did I know! They even had some audience participation. Ang thinks the guy volunteer was "planted." I personally think that there's always going to be at least one exhibitionist guy at a show such as this. You didn't have to ask him twice to drop trou. And, for his bold assertiveness, he learned how to make "the hamburger." Something I'm sure he'll be able to impress the ladies with for years to come, haha. I...
Full run I'm sad that my boys have to tire themselves out by playing all seven games against the ducks. But that's alright, it gives me one more chance to catch them during a playoff game. And besides, who could complain about watching more games if it meant seeing more of Iginla? *swoon* Still 2 of my favorite pictures of him ever , like it really needs any explanation:
Easter treats Happy Easter, everyone! I'm proud to say I survived my whole Lent thing. Well, minus my birthday weekend. But I figured I still did more than 40 days so I'm all clear. And to celebrate, my family and I are going to have some gorgeous steaks and baked potatoes. Easter and the first BBQ of the year. It doesn't get any better than that. I commend my family's innovativeness (is that a word?) As much as I love turkey a steak would be a dream come true right about now. Go Flames Go! I can't wait for my Iggy jersey to arrive! It must be soon. Just in time for playoffs, mmmm. Weird Kid and I should go pick up some more beer to prepare. We finished off the Coronas during last week's Pokerfest. (I finished in 5th...but I had a great time and some fantastic hands.) Civic comes home today but Daisy is away for Easter break. Figures one comes home and the other one goes away. At least I only had to entertain myself for a couple of days, haha. Posi...
'cuz I'm a woman...w-o-m-a-n I've already told you I love the spring, but the best part is the milder weather it brings with it. Not too hot, not too cold, juuuuust right. Perfect for wearing a greater variety of clothes. I get to wear more of my hats now without fear of overheating, wider array of jackets to choose from...and shoes, too, of course! And skirts. They're the icing on the cake. It's more difficult dealing with wearing a skirt in harsh winter temperatures or the gross slush during the thawout. But now I can wear skirts in full force. Like today. I love skirts, I wish I had more of them. They are one of the fashion pieces that truly distinguish us from the men (other than weird French teens such as the young man Daisy saw in London wearing a skirt...and kilts, I suppose). We can wear pants just like they can. We can wear anything they wear, only we usually wear it better. But skirts are just for us alone. And I love that. My previous coworker...
Enter... The scene: a half-empty C-Train car. Girl in black trench and copper purse (that'd be me) sits in an empty booth and settles in for the commute to work. Young exec-type guy enters the booth and sits right across from me. Quick survey of mr exec: dark barely pinstriped suit, blue tie, blue dress shirt, well-groomed au courant hairstyle, leather laptop attache on the seat beside him. I don't know what it was about him, but he had my attention. Obviously he wasn't hideous, but he just seemed like your run-of-the-mill bean counter. And yet I was turned on. Truth be known I love suits. I love guys in suits. But then again I love guys in military uniforms, hockey uniforms, casual wear. I suppose there aren't many "types" of guys that I would pass on wholeheartedly. Punks are one definite that comes to mind. Aaaaanyway... So young exec guy is sitting across from me and I can't stop from stealing glances at him. His lips looked yummy, he smelle...
Zone The past few years the house several doors down from mine has been rented out to a rotation of university guys. Majority of whom are ridiculously good-looking. A "hottie house," if you will. Then last summer I was taking a stroll to my friendly neighborhood Tim Horton's and I noticed another house down-the-way was inhabited by yet another group of ridiculously good-looking muchachos. So, you know, at this point I was beginning to wonder if I had not somehow been transported to some kind of hottie community. A hottie zone. Surely this would generate an increase in real estate value. Desperate housewives have no idea what they're missing. So far, knock on wood, my neighborhood is cougar-free. Sunday, more proof of the hottie zone: I was waiting for my bus (I'm taking another salsa class. Like you're all really surprised!) when this gorgeous, hot Euro kind of guy leans against the sound barrier waiting for the bus with me. Where did this guy come fr...
It's all just a little bit of history repeating. It's definitely Spring, a season I love. Time for change, metamorphosis, rejuvenation, all that jazz. But somethings don't seem to change much. Or if they do it's in a cycle. I had decided I had had enough with growing out my hair. Time for a haircut, as I'm always apt to do around my birthday. So, chop chop. That same night I was showing someone a picture of me and my friends from 7 years ago and wouldn't you know it my hair is pretty much identical to that picture. Which also made me wonder how whenever I go to a stylist looking for a completely fresh new look...something different that I've never done before, it never fails to look pretty much the same. The whole rounded bob business. I guess that's just what works for me and all the stylists seem to come to that consensus. That same night a guy from back in the day was back in super-flirt mode. The problem with him is I don't know if he's just ...
Where's the love? Technology is not my friend right now. A shame, really, since I love my little gadgets. Computer is still being a brat. It goes through a cycle of 1, 2, sometimes 3 resets before I can finally login sometimes. This next complaint is more esthetics but...I've cracked the rubber lining on my iPod headphones. Civic and I went scouring the stores for a replacement pair (since we doubt I could get a new set with my warranty since it still works sublimely...it just looks ghetto, is all) but all they have to offer now are those in-ear earbuds. I want the regular earbuds. *sigh* My dad, ever my hero, "fixed" it up with some blue electrical tape, but I still want a nice-looking pair. My latest celly, "The Hotness," all of a sudden has a dysfunctional camera. I know it used to work. But who knows when it conked out on me 'cuz I'm not one to use the camera function regularly. So I took it to my friendly tech boys who sent it away. N...